Genius

Holy quilting! So I finished the top of my first quilt in 5 days, go me! I'm waiting for it to be top quilted right now. I started my second quilt Scrappy Trip around the World by Bonnie Hunt. I'm doing it in, you guessed it, 1930s fabric. Its looking awesome! Ill post pictures soon.

As it turns out, Vivian, my sewing machine, is feeling her age slightly. The belt that was on her is really old and dry rotted which is cause it to slip and mess my tension up. So since she is running under the weather I decided to detail her. I cleaned all the old grease, oil, finger prints and god knows what else off her, down to the cracks, then used Boys good 3M wax and put a nice solid 2 coats on. I even took my motor off so I could wax behind it, and wax the entire motor case. While I was playing with stuff and cleaning, I decided to mess with my bobbin winder which has never worked on the machine since I dug it out from under my desk. It was always gummed up and never spun correctly, just burnt the rubber gasket up. Well I added a couple drops of oil and started working it around and some gunk came out and after adding some more oil, it started working like a charm! I'm a goddamn sewing machine genius!! Now I don't have to have Lynn wind all my bobbins for me, or have to stop because all my bobbins are empty. All I have to do now is wait for my new belt and I'm all set!

Another list of things I learned since I started quilting:
~I suck at sewing straight lines. For serious, its terrible. A blind man could do better.
~ Love you iron! Better make peace with it, its going to be your best friend. I find my little travel Rowenta to be a dream come true. Fits nicely right beside Viv when I'm piecing.
~ Good light. You can do nothing without a good light. Thank god for my clearance Ott light

Oh yea, things that Ive discovered in my week quilting:
~I love 1930's era fabric like this , especially the hexagon patterns like Merry go Round
~ Hand quilting Grandma's Flower Garden Quilt is something I am going to do before I die.
~Im learning to like batiks, especially the vibrant colors of the bali batiks
~ Im absolutley in love with Joel Dewberry's Chickadee Aviary 2 fabric. It is so going to be my new quilt on the bed and a bag of some sort.

Quilting, me? No way

Recently, an awesome lady names Lynn started taking a sock class from me up at the shop. While talking, she informed me she was a quilting teacher. Now before I go further I want to admit that I had never had any interest before in quilting. I saw it as a time waster away from knitting and derby and a space hog because I couldnt possibly be asked to give up or :gasp: share my yarn space with fabric. Not to mention most of the preconceived notions I had of quilting were of old ladies making ugly quilts with hideous fabric (kinda sounds like what most people think about knitting, HA!). Anyway I expressed interest in possibly learning to quilt to Lynn and she said she would be willing to trade quilting lessons for knitting lessons. Hot damn! I love bartering! She brought me quilting magazines I could pour over to get idea's about quilt styles and fabric colors and techniques. So last week Lynn took me to Mabelena's in Ortonville and it was love at first sight.

Lynn showed me all the awesome things I could make with fabric and which fabrics were good and not good for quilting. She schooled me on the art of which threads, rotary cutters, cutting mats, scissors and most important, machines were the best. She helped me pick my pattern Yellow Brick Road (totally fitting and maybe a sign from the quilting gods?), and my fabric because when presented with hundreds of beautiful fabrics, I got overwhelmed, much like I do with picking my yarn colors. And I walked away a happy little camper with some gorgeous fabric.

But wait! What was I going to do about a sewing machine?! I didnt have one. Was my not so carefully and impulsive plan about to come crumbling down around me because of lack of the most important thing? Shit!! Then I remembered that after a good family friend passed away, I inherited a sewing machine, which I had never actually seen because I had never taken the cover off and just put it under my desk. What I discovered was an absolute joy. I have a Singer Spartan, which from everything I could find on it, Spartan was Singers base model machine but it was built with all of the quality that you would expect from a Singer. The Spartan is a stripped-down model 99. It was a very basic, bare bones machine, that came without a light, without anywhere to mount a light, no decals, no carrying case and weights around 16lbs (Aka- heavier the shit!).  Despite all that, everyone agrees it is an amazing little work horse of a machine that sews beautiful seams. I fell in love with her and named her "Vivian". Viv also came with the original manual that appears to have been a service mans manual, so I got super detailed pictures on where and how to oil, take apart and put back together, etc. I did as Lynn instructed me and cleaned and oiled her before I even tried to see if she ran. And of course, she ran like a little champ right off the bat. With a little tweaking from Lynn, my stitch tension was awesome and I was on my way.

I started cutting my pieces on Monday (as in this past Monday, 5 days ago) and sewing my pieces into blocks the next day. Wednesday I skipped derby practice to stay home and quilt (hey, we won our game 3 days before so it was okay), seamed all my blocks together on Thursday and put my borders on Friday. Next week it goes off to the long arm quilter to get put together. Of course, NONE of this would of happened without Lynn's help. She was such a great teacher, and as it turns out, a great friend and surrogate mom. She has me totally hooked to quilting like a crack head.

I did however run into a few snags along the way. Thursday night when I was sewing the final strips of blocks together I started panicking when I started coming up an inch or more short at the end of the row, blocks weren't matching up correctly (or more correctly they were matching and they weren't suppose too for the pattern), then I somehow came up an entire block short at the end of the row. I finally sat back staring bewildered at the quilt thinking "What the fuck is going on here?!?" and
realizing it has grown any longer even after I added two rows. Now at this point Im thinking to myself I screwed this up so bad and Lynn is going to fire me as a student and my quilting days are over. Then I did what I should of done in the first place and layed my quilt out on the floor. Once it hit the floor I realized I hadnt been sewing my rows on the bottom of the quilt like I was suppose to, I was sewing them along the sides of the quilt!! Relief flooded through me and I quickly (well, not exactly quickly) took the seams apart, repressed them and did it the correct way, making sure I had the correct edge of the quilt. By 10pm Thursday night, with pieces of ripped out thread in my hair and peppered all over my chest and legs, I hung the completed sewn blocks on my felt board (which is hanging over the master bath shower doors because its the only place I could find big enough to hang it) and stared in amazement at my quilt. I couldnt (and still cant) believe I had actually made it. Me, sewing, becoming a domestic goddess!

Happy Birthday Jesus

Well, Im playing around on the new laptop thinking to myself "I need to start blogging again". Since Ive gained like, a million pounds, Im going on a healthy kick for the new year. Rita and I signed up for a Planet Fitness membership and we are doing The Biggest Loser through her work. Rita and I are a couple of fat chicks who want to get healthy not skinny. Big difference. Our goal is to, of course, slim down, but to be overall healthier in our everyday choices. We want to also tone our bodies up to better help our derby game. Our goal is to become kick ass Derbots.
Ive decided to document my progress on my blog. Hopefully it will serve as something I can look back on and see where Im having problems, etc. So Im saying Goodbye back fat and hello flat tummy!
Gaining weight has really been a problem for me these last 6 months due to depression. I couldnt understand why I wasnt interested in derby or knitting anymore and why all I wanted to do was sleep ALL day, everyday. When I finally figured it out, I was 30 lbs heavier and feeling like a tub of lard.
So Im taking back my life and being healthier in order to be a better person is what I plan on doing. I know Ill struggle at first, but I can do it. I didnt realize just how out of shape I was till last week when we go to Jackson Hole, WY to ski. I had to walk up about 30 steps in my ski boots and winter gear to get to the base of the mountain (in all honesty, not that far of a walk for a regular, in shape person), and by the time I got to the base, I was sweating like a whore in church and was gasping for breath. It was a rude awakening just how out of shape I really was. There were times skiing in Jackon Hole when I had to stop and catch my breath, especially the higher I went, because I was so out of shape. It was downright embaressing. I mean, Im suppose to be an athelete  who plays derby. In truth, Im sucking major air and have fresh meat passing me by.
Im sick of being ashamed and grossed out by myself. Its time to do something about it. This year will be a good one :)

Hot fun in the Summer Time

Ah, what an awesome summer its been so far...well for the most part. Other then my intestines feeling like their going to explode, its been a great summer. We've been on the lake wakeboarding as mush as possible and thats been super fun. I got new bindings for my board this summer, some Ronix Relik's and Im in love with them. Ive been using Shauns Murray board and I love it. Its so light!! Its like there is nothing attached to my feet.

And since my intestines hate me so much. I havent been able to skate for about a month :(  Its taking everything I have to get out of bed and go to work. Doctors still dont know whats wrong but Ive been in for a CAT Scan (dont have results yet) and ultrasounds, but nothing thus far. As twisted as it sounds, Im really hoping its acutally something instead of nothing, because its its nothing, it means I have one of the most severe case's of IBS my doctors ever seen. If its something, they can fix it.

Death by Change?

Impending doom is looming over my world and dispite what anyone says, there isnt anything I can do about it. I feel a large change about to take place and I can only sit back, hold on and say "Holy fuck, this sucks but at least Im not being eaten by great white sharks". (even though if I could choose an animal to get eaten by, it would totally be a fucking Great White Shark!)

I hate when I cant be funny or think of something funny because everything I know is about to change. What a downer, damnit!

Fuck, I need to Keep this Shit Up

Ok, Ive decided Im going to try and keep my blog updated even if its useless bullshit. After a long lull and absense from blogging due to procrastination and lack of sibstance, Ive been inspired again to blog by http://www.hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/, which is Allie Brosh's blog. She is seriously a fucking literary genius (and if you dont think so, I'll set your house on fire. Kindding. Maybe). It was like a sign from Jebus and a chorus of retarded angels parted and started singing when I read her blog. I was all like "Holy fucking shit! Someone else thinks exactly like I do, thats fucking awesomeness!!!" but then I was like "Wait a minute, does this mean that she is me?" then I got worried and thought "Do I have a sister out there I dont know about, is she more awesome then I am? I mean, my moms was kinda of ho back in the day, but that was the times (dont fucking judge her! Thats my job assholes!)" then paranoia "Oh my god, she has stolen all of my awesomeness from our gene pool, is my evil, genius twin and left me to just be the retarded polish one, FUCK!!! Bitch!!". Then reality kicked back in and I was like "Wait, she is fucking awesomeness to the power of ninty elebinty!!!". Word.

So Im sitting here trying to think of something serious and interesting to say but I cant because I have no attention span right now, Im doing 3 things at once, Facebooking, searching Etsy for vintage knitting things, and trying to type this. Im failing. Im thinking I need to search out new layouts for my blog because this one is really old and I cant do awesome one work links with this format Im using now, at least I dont think I can. I am computer retarded. Anyone know how? I'll have to see what I can do. I also hate how this format loads pictures on here. I can only put pictures on certain spots, and that piss's me off. I cant put them where I want them so my blog flows nice and they way I see it in my head, it flows all fucked up and choppy the way the stupid ass computer wants it. Blah! Commie ass computer.

But I made derby signs today and there totally awesome and that made me happy :) Our sister leaugue, the Muskegon Skee Town Skirtz are playing Mid-Michigan Derby Girls tomorrow and Im so prepared to watch the Skirtz kill Mis-Mich. My signs are full of kick assness and its going to be a great game. Flints last home bout is this Sunday. Im kinda happy its our last home game and kind of sad. Happy because my poor body needs a break from getting the shit kicked out of me by all the fucking butch chicks with dicks, amazon bitchlings. (sorry if your a chick with a dick, thats totally cool as long as you dont check me in the face during a bout, that sucks and hurts) And sad because I no longer get to go hit bitches every weekend. I mean I do get to hit bitch's, but those bitch's are my teammates and its just different and not has fun as hitting a total stranger. Its like molesting them, only with consent, and its all okay after and everyone is happy and you get to walk away and never see them again so you dont have they weird ass akwardness that follows. I love Roller Derby!

Ok, I feel drunk because Im so tired so Im going to bed. Please dont die while Im asleep. I would be sad. Im leaving you with an awesome picture of my derby alter-ego JackHerUp Rabbit #10-4 because Im a badass and thats how I roll.

The Devil Wins Again...

Yea, Tony Schumacher won US Nationals again for the 8th time tieing Big Daddy Don Garlits for the most winningest Top fuel driver. I swear, drag racing was against me yesterday. Why does it hate me so? Why does it allow Satan Tony to win even though Allen Johnson is no longer his crew chief? Why oh why? At least Ashley Force won in Funny Car becoming the first female to EVER win a US National in history in Funny Car so that was awesome. What was even more awesome was her dad, John Force almost kicking Tony Pedregons ass for talking shit about John Force Racing, right after Ashley kicked his ass racing!! It was pretty intense and funny to watch. God I love drag racing!! US Nationals is, after all, the most important race of the entire year and a win there means more to drivers then winning over all championships.

But other then racing not much else is going on. My mouth finally stopped hurting from getting my teeth pulled, but I still have super annoying holes in my mouth that catch food and from what I hear, this lasts for a while, shit.

I was in the Flint Journal for Roller Derby in August. http://blog.mlive.com/higher-education/2009/08/the_flint_roller_derby_girls_a.html Im obviously the one in the pink with the green plaid helmet with my name captioned next to the picture. Its a horrific picture of me. NO ONE looks good bent over in pads and my face looks huge and swollon because it is, I had had my wisdom teeth pulled two weeks before and that was the first practice back that I could get my mouth guard in without tearing out my stitches out and the the swelling allowed me too. I was also in The Grand Blanc View last week http://viewnewspapers.net/moxie2/Scene/flint-city-derby-girls-ge.shtml The pictures too small to see but Im there and Im quoted at the very end. She put in exactly what I wanted her too. As being one of the heads of Promotions Committee for Flint City Derby Girls, its really important I get the word out about all the great things we do for our city and out community.

But now I need to sleep because I have derby practice tomorrow and Boys going to kick my ass during it because, of yea, he's our coach. Coach Nazi, and we love him for it!! But I need my sleep. It takes alot out of me and out first real Bout is this Sunday at Rollhaven at 6pm.

Someone Please cut my head off

I wish I could say that laying awake in the chair this morning watching the fish tank come alive with the rising of the sun was as magical and breath taking as last time, but something is seriously missing when your wishing someone would cut your head of and the only thing taking away you breath is pain. Shall I explain? I had my 3 wisdom teeth pulled yesterday. It wasnt such a wonderful night and itsnt turning into a glorious day. I layed awake in pain and nauseousness most of the night and it seems like everytime I did fall alseep, my alarm would go off to take more shitty pain pills that didnt work because for the first 12 hours I couldnt take good stuff cuz I had, had too much anesthesia. So finally after feeling sick to my stomach and in ALOT of pain, I ate a piece of bread with the add of water, took a big boy pill and fell asleep for a couple hours. Then my alarm went off for more pills and I couldnt sleep after that so I watched fish and started re-reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. OH, and did I mention I wasnt allowed to sleep up stairs which was why I was in the chair in the first place? Yea, had to keep my head elevated. Which turned out to be a good idea cuz I couldnt lay on the side of my face if you paid me. Thank god for my over stuffed velure airline pillow. Its the only thing that supports my neck and doesnt press into my ever so sore cheeks

And for the funny part. Boy was I HIGH off my ass yesterday, oh my good lord. I dont know WHAT they gave me but geez. I remember the nursing giving me Nitrious Oxicide and asking how I felt and in honestly I was getting a little paranoid and panicky from that feeling, but I told her if she was giving it too me because she thought I was going to freak out when they put the IV in I would be fine, Im not afraid of needles. She "Oh, okat, we'll just give you more oxygen then" and after that I felt better. Then the doctor came in, put my IV in and I remember NOTHING after that. The next thing I remember is waking up in the recovery chair talking to Boy about marriage (scary!!). And could of sworn he was laughing at me. But the car ride home made me a little nauseous and then Boy had to practically hold me up to get me in the house I was so high. And while him and his mom where trying to figure out where to put me, I just layed down on the stairs and closed my eyes. Apparently I couldnt be bothered. But I was soon moved to the couch with the aid of Boy and I was out. I woke up to a note on my knee's saying he was next door working on the car and call him if I needed him and my cell in my lap. When he finally got home I asked him how my face looked and he told me to close my mouth, that he already wasnt feeling good. I didnt get it. It wasnt until I got into the bathroom and looked at myself that I realize that he ment. All my teeth were cover in dry caked blood along with some wet, my gauze was soaked red with blood. It looks like someone beat the shit out of me with a bat, and felt just the same, only half my face literally was still frozen then. I pulled my gauze out, rinsed my mouth the best I would, wipped my teeth off the best I could too and packed myself back with gauze. I was still scared at 6 this morning when if you went directly to the middle of my lower lip, drew a line down to my chin, everything to the right of it was still numb. I was begining to think the doc. fucked up. But by 10am I could feel it so everything was ok. The swelling isnt as bad as I thought it was going to be and the pain could be 10 times worse, but it still sucks major ass all the same. Now Im just chillin, about to attempt to do some knitting and read HP Half Blood Prince. And for the faint of heart, you may want to skip the pictures. For those of you that know me I just HAD to take them. I had to sneak my camera while still high, while Boy was in the shower. Have fun!

Me showing off mai bloody grill AH, up close!

Bloody tongue with a clog I think. Blue Steal with a half dead face, but I tried!

Well You Know

Not too much happening round my parts. Boy and I celebrated our 4 year anniversary on Friday. He took me to Bennihana's, which to be completely honest, doesnt feel special anymore because we go there so much, but none the less, it was still a nice dinner out with him. I wanted to go roller skating too, but his neck was hurting really bad so we didnt go. Oh well, he made up for it later :winkwink:

Think I threw my back out this weekend. My lower back is killing me. I thought it was hurting because maybe I was going to start my period, but its been three days and no period, but still a killing back. I spent all day yesterday laying on the floor in the fish room on a heating pad with my feet up on my knitting chair watching the fish tank. The tank actuallyt looks cool as hell upside down, the water is mezmorizing from that angle. And the fish kept staring at me like, what the fuck are you doing down there, and feed us. Eventually after 3 hours they lost intrest in me and did there own thing. I didnt sleep well because it was hurting so bad, and Ive come close to ODing on Advil yesterday and today (but not really), and Im chillin' with the heating pad right now, and it still hurts. I just dont know WHAT I did. And yes it hurt before I got my freak on with Boy friday night, so that wasnt what did it.

KNitting wise, Im still plugging along for my Master Knitting. Cathy has told me that on Wednesdays she wants me knitting my master knitting stuff from 2-4p to set a good example. I told her if she was going to twist my arm about sitting there and knitting while getting paid, I guess I have no choice. My job is just so tough I tell yea. I also turned the heels and picked up the gussets for my 2 socks on DPN's last night. Suprisingly, it was actually really easy. I like my students are going to be totally okay with doing it. Its not that confusing at all. Im doing the gusset decresses right now. They should be done by next week. Im also casted on a felted tote using the Lizard Ridge blanket pattern from Knitty. Its gonna look so bad ass when Im done. Im also doing a class on that too.

All and all, things are good I would say. except for this shit ass back crap which is for the god damn birds.